terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
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