are you so shy because you have an std?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
