next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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