After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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