he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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