Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
