I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
