I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
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I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
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I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
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