I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize