She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
