This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
