So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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