i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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