i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize