i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Someone shattered a urinal.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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