He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
