I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
