I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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