so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
