so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
