I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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