as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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