FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
