I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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