Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
