Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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