I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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