Christians are straight up FREAKS
I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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