I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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