oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize