She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Randomize
