I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
