We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
What changed your mind?
Being sober
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
