Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize