at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
