Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
