who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
