Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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