New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize