my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
