dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize