Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Randomize