you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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