Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
