More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass