Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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