their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
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I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
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Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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