I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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