and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
