just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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