are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Randomize
