there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Randomize